I think in this day and age, we understand that working together helps our relationship. Accepting and supportive spouses are good for our mental health too; however, the divorce rate in the U.S. for most couples stands at a whopping 40 to 50% and higher for those who remarry. Within Four Pillars or BaZi, we find that each and every person will experience some form of relationship hardship. Maybe not as difficult as others, but the majority of us according to Four Pillars can expect relationship woes at some time or other.

If you want to know the outlook of the energy conditions of your relationship just from your perspective, you can look at your Bazi profile to see if your spouse palace contains supportive or antagonizing elements. Weak Day Masters (DM) need support from the spouse palace element while strong DM’s need to control or produce the spouse palace element.

In the five element production cycle earth controls water, water controls fire, fire controls metal, metal controls wood, and wood controls earth. For the male, the DM-if strong, needs to control the spouse palace element in order to enjoy a long-lasting satisfying relationship. For the female, the DM-if strong needs an element in the spouse palace that balances her strong DM.

*Remember we only read the chart this way due to the idea back in the day the number of wives proved a man’s wealth capacity. Also, controlling the spouse palace does not mean controlling the spouse. Instead, a man with wealth capacity means he needs to be able to take care (manage, control) his wealth through a strong DM element.

For those with weak DMs, the person needs a supportive spouse palace element. A weak DM has other concerns than controlling another element! We would not expect a person with an illness to produce the same outcome as a healthy person. For example, a female with a weak DM and an element in her spouse palace that controls her DM means her DM is further weakened by the spouse palace element. She will be miserable in her relationship unless she takes steps to overcome the issues in her chart. Finally, the yearly energy clashing with the spouse palace means the person (male or female) will experience hardship in his or her relationship.

In all of Chinese metaphysics, we understand that we are never “fated” with certain aspects of life. We are not stuck in life without the chance of a good relationship or meeting our soul mate. Hardly. Chinese metaphysics gives us a snap shot of many aspects of our life and the potential outcome based on the energy given us at birth so we know what we must do to counteract the issues in order to take control of our destiny!



Harrington, J., and Buckingham, C. (2018). Broken Hearts: A rundown of the divorce capital of every state. Retrieved from https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/economy/2018/02/02/broken-hearts-rundown-divorce-capital-every-state/1078283001/

Yap, J. (2005). Bazi: The Destiny Code. Kuala Lumpar, Malaysia; Joey Yap Research Group SDN BHD.


Amy Thompson

Amy is a psychology graduate, founder of Feng Shui Enthusiast, and Life Coach. In her spare time, she enjoys front-end development, content writing, her new puppy Max, photography, and organizing.


Buster Sharma · August 17, 2018 at 6:48 pm

I truly treasure your piece of work, Great post.

Janetta Lown · August 26, 2018 at 6:30 pm

you are my inspiration , I possess few blogs and sometimes run out from to brand : (.

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